Last Sunday night, I subjected my teens to an '80s movie night. After the eye rolls stopped and the movie started rolling, it became clear that Can't Buy Me Love is a classic for a reason—with lessons that resonate for both kids and adults (and entrepreneurs!).
If you haven't seen it (or it's been a while), here's the gist: nerdy outcast Ronald Miller wants to be part of the popular crowd, but instead of waiting to get noticed, he buys his way in by striking a deal with the most popular girl in school. The glow-up works—at least for a while—but eventually, he learns that status isn't something that gets handed to you.
When Ronald breaks out a dance he saw on public television - the African Anteater Ritual - at his high school prom, his peers are quick to mock him. The dance is erratic and bizarre, a far cry from the norm, yet he remains utterly committed to it. His confidence transforms ridicule into curiosity, and before long, the entire school is performing this strange dance right alongside him.
The lesson: You must create your own identity to get noticed.
This isn't just a throwback movie lesson—it's playing out in real life every day. A friend of mine recently told me she was concerned about her teenage daughter who was feeling left out. Her daughter had fallen into the social media trap—scrolling past parties she wasn't invited to, watching classmates hang out without her, each swipe adding to a growing sense of isolation. The advice from her therapist was straightforward: Throw your own party.
Simple? Yes. Game-changing? Absolutely. Because this isn't just about high school drama—it's about how we show up in life and business. Why sit there watching everyone else's highlight reel when you could be creating your own? Stop waiting for the invitation. Send one.
At Pizzana, we recently lived this same lesson. We've been around for eight years now (wild!), and for a long time, we were riding high on organic buzz. Media loved us, customers couldn't stop talking about us, and we barely had to lift a finger to keep the conversation going. Pretty sweet spot to be in—but here's the truth: we got comfortable. Too comfortable. And then we noticed the chatter starting to quiet down.
Don't get me wrong—our loyal customers were still showing up. But they weren't shouting about us anymore. They were steady, not loud. And let's be real: loyalty pays the bills, but buzz builds the future. We had to face facts: if we weren't doing anything worth talking about, why would anyone talk about us?
So we took that therapist’s andvice and decided to throw our own damn party—literally! We rolled up our sleeves and started filling our calendar with events that would get people excited again.
We launched 90s trivia nights in Silver Lake and set up chef collaborations in WeHo - both benefitting LA wildfire relief efforts. We gave people a reason to show up and show out. In fact, our upcoming chef collaboration between Pizzana chef Daniele Uditi and Apollonia Pizza Chef Justin De Leon was so popular it sold out instantly, forcing us to add a third seating (at 4:00pm!). And last night, while the Dallas Girl Gang was happy hour-ing together in Dallas I was co-hosting a female founder-funder dinner with Ruffin Mitchener of Brydge Club at our Marina Del Rey restaurant, generously sponsored by HSBC, Escalon, and DHL Piper.
We are creating moments worth talking about, and I can feel the energy shifting. People are buzzing about us - both in person and online. We're reclaiming our place—not just as a restaurant people love, but as a destination people are eager to talk about and share.
Here's the thing: when you're feeling sidelined—in business or life—you've got two choices: sit there waiting for someone to notice you, or stand up and make some noise.
Too many of us choose to wait. Wait to be discovered. Wait for that perfect opportunity. Wait for someone else to tell our story. But you know what? That perfect someone isn't going to magically appear in your living room, and neither is that perfect opportunity. To get people talking about you, you have to do something that gets people talking. It's that simple.
This was true with Sprinkles. Back in 2005, I did something that seemed crazy—I opened a bakery that only sold cupcakes. I was surrounded by naysayers: But it's never been done before. But we're in the low-carb era. But people in LA are too health-conscious for this. But, but, but…
While everyone was raising objections—"A cupcakes-only bakery? Who would do that?"—I was too busy creating an entirely new category to care. I was obsessed with building a luxury cupcake experience nobody had seen before. I was putting on my own party.
And you know what happened? People noticed. First our Beverly Hills neighbors couldn't stop talking about these cupcakes. Word spread to the entertainment agencies nearby (trust me, assistants know where all the good food is), and suddenly their high-profile clients were sending drivers to pick up dozens. Next thing we knew, Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise were stopping by, which got more people talking, which caught Oprah's attention. The buzz kept building on itself—more celebrities, more press, more lines around the block.
We weren't waiting to be invited to someone else's party; we were too busy creating our own celebration of what we believed in. And when the buzz started building, we had to keep feeding it. Keep innovating. Keep giving people something to talk about. (Hello, Cupcake ATM!)
That's the thing about buzz—it's not just about getting people talking. It's about being so passionate about what you're creating that others can't help but want to join your party.
If nobody's talking about you, ask yourself: what have you done lately that's worth talking about? If you're drawing a blank, that's your sign.
Is your business feeling stale? Stop waiting for inspiration to strike. Host a workshop that teaches what you know. Launch that product line you've been sitting on. Create a pop-up experience that gets people excited. Partner with another brand in a way nobody expects. Give people a reason to remember why they loved you in the first place.
Feeling invisible in your industry? Stop lurking in the shadows. Start that podcast you've been dreaming about. Write the blog post that says what everyone's thinking but no one's saying. Build your own table instead of begging for a seat at someone else's. Your perspective matters—but only if you share it.
Life feeling stuck? Take that bold step. Book the trip. Start the class. Host the dinner party you keep putting off. Stop waiting for the perfect moment to reinvent yourself. The perfect moment is now.
Here's what I know for sure: Energy creates energy. Buzz builds buzz. And momentum? It starts with movement.
So next time you're feeling left out, ask yourself: am I waiting for the party, or am I planning one?
Throw your own party. Trust me—people will show up.
What's one way you can throw your own party this week? Leave a comment for our Sweet Success community below.
XO,
candace
I’m currently running an online bakery from home and I’m on the autism spectrum and I just ordered your Sweet Success book as a resource to get the tools to make my company the best it can be! And I definitely want to throw my own party as well! To the point!
CANDACE!!! I just wrote about “Can’t Buy Me Love” too! https://genxtaste.substack.com/p/cant-buy-me-love