The Loneliest Number: Why Your Solo Act is Holding You Back

Ditch the DIY Mindset and Embrace Community

Recently, I shared the three biggest mistakes I've made on my business journey, and wow, did it strike a chord! Not only was it my most reposted and saved post ever, but the organizer of an upcoming conference where I'm keynoting reached out to request that I tailor my talk specifically to this theme. Clearly, these stumbling blocks are still tripping up women business owners, founders, and leaders everywhere.

So, in the spirit of helping you sidestep the pitfalls I tumbled into (it's why I wrote "Sweet Success," after all!), I'm dedicating today and two more upcoming newsletters to doing a deep dive into each of these mistakes.

Let's start with Mistake #1: Thinking entrepreneurship was a solo gig.

Confession time: Fresh out of the corporate world, where teamwork is the mantra, I fancied myself a lone wolf in the startup wilderness. I was channeling my inner Howard Roark from "The Fountainhead," all uncompromising vision and steely determination. Opening Sprinkles had required believing in myself, working alone, and rejecting the naysayers, right?

Also, as a new leader, I felt the weight of everyone's expectations. I was terrified to show any weakness, convinced that a single crack in my façade would undermine my authority. It took me far too long to realize that seeking support isn't a sign of weakness – it's a superpower.

Can you relate? Does it sometimes feel like you're in a silo of your own making, just you against the world, with no one to turn to because surely no one could understand what you're going through?

Here's the truth: That "rugged individualist" approach is far less effective than we'd like to believe. As women, we toss around the phrase "it takes a village" when it comes to parenting. Guess what? The same philosophy applies to our work lives.

As my friend Nina Westbrook, family therapist and host of the "Do Tell" podcast, wisely says: "Communities offer us emotional support, companionship, and an opportunity to create shared experiences." (Check out our recent podcast episode)

Now, let's break down why flying solo is so last season:

• Emotional Support: Entrepreneurship is a rollercoaster. You need someone who gets it to share the highs, lows, and everything in between.

• Knowledge Sharing: Why reinvent the wheel? Learn from others' mistakes and successes to fast-track your own growth.

• Collaboration Opportunities: Two heads are often better than one. Connecting with other entrepreneurs can lead to innovative solutions and partnerships.

• Finding Your Tribe: Meet people who speak your language. No more feeling like you're on a solo mission in a world that doesn't quite get you.

Now that we've established why community is crucial, let's explore some practical ways to find your tribe

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1. Membership-Based Communities: Want to level up your network and find your tribe? Membership-based groups might be just what you're looking for. Digital platforms like 10th House by Female Founders Collective offer a supportive online community and educational events featuring industry experts. Meanwhile, local groups such as Dallas Girl Gang provide in-person networking opportunities and fun events. Whether you're aiming to expand your business network or find like-minded friends to share your entrepreneurial journey, these communities have something for everyone. In fact, I'm thrilled to be keynoting Dallas Girl Gang's Boss Vision Conference in Dallas this September!

2. Mastermind Groups: Don't let the name intimidate you - we're not talking about supervillains plotting world domination here! A mastermind is simply a small group of 4-6 entrepreneurs at a similar growth stage who meet regularly to set goals, troubleshoot challenges, and hold each other accountable. Think of it as your personal board of directors, minus the stuffy suits and boring boardroom. These groups can be incredibly powerful for pushing your business forward. By the way, if you're in the digital product space and your business is hitting that sweet $500k+ revenue mark, my friend Amy Porterfield is launching a mastermind that might be perfect for you. And no, you don't need to know a secret handshake to join! (Check out my recent podcast with Amy and Jasmine Star!)

   

3. Mentorship: Never underestimate the power of learning from those who've walked the path before you. Consider creating a personal "board of mentors" to tap into diverse experiences and expertise. Reach out to potential mentors on LinkedIn with specific, time-bound requests. Remember, mentorship is a two-way street - always look for ways to add value to your mentors' lives too. (If you need a refresher, make sure you check out my post on why you should never just ask someone to pick their brain!)

And let's not forget the fringe benefits of community:

• Accountability Partners: Find a fellow entrepreneur and schedule regular check-ins to share goals and progress.

• Potential Clients or Collaborators: Always be ready with your elevator pitch and follow up promptly after networking events.

• Networking Events: Use industry mixers or startup pitch nights to practice your networking skills in low-pressure environments.

Remember, even the most successful entrepreneurs didn't get there alone. Behind every Steve Jobs is a Steve Wozniak. Behind every Oprah is a Gayle. You get the idea.

Now, about those other two mistakes I mentioned in that viral post. Don't worry, I'm not leaving you hanging. In the next few weeks, I'll be tackling:

Mistake #2: Micromanaging my team (or, "How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Delegation")

Mistake #3: Not separating myself from the business (aka "Taking Everything Personally: You're Going to Get an Ulcer!")

Until then, keep building those connections. Your future self (and your cortisol levels) will thank you!

XO,

candace

P.S. I'd love to hear about your community-building experiences! Drop a comment below sharing your biggest challenge or success in finding your entrepreneurial tribe!